Syracuse Funny Bone | Show Details | Frank Caliendo | Comedian | FunnyBoneCentral.com

10301 Destiny USA Drive
Syracuse, NY 13204
(315) 423-8669 | Contact | Map It

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Frank Caliendo

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"Life's a Sketch... And then you die."

Born at the age of three in northern Illinois, Frank was already ahead of his time. Even on the day of his birth, Frank's two younger brothers knew something was funny.

Before he could even speak, Frank's mother noticed him doing an incredible impersonation of a young Dudley Moore. Of course Frank's father reasoned that all babies sound like they are drunk and heave all over themselves, but that is not the point. This kid had something special. He seemed likely to perhaps have a chance to maybe someday possibly become questionably close to one of the funniest persons alive.

Naturally it was never fully discovered how gifted Frank was, until one day when an unidentified philosopher named John Hartz would declare Frank as "talent"; ...not "a talent", "with talent", or even "a talented individual", but simply as "talent". Never before had any man ever been labeled with such vague ambiguity. This incited Frank, and almost immediately he would establish thoughts about becoming a stand up comedian.

Of course Frank didn't always want to be a stand up comedian. At a youthful age, Frank boarded a train to head for baseball's spring training as a fireball left-hander with blazing speed. After a short stop in Iolla, where he struck out one of baseball's greatest players with three straight pitches, Frank re-boarded the train to meet a woman who with the pull of a trigger would knock him out of baseball for the next sixteen years.

Frank would later return to baseball as a middle-aged rookie. He used a bat made from a tree struck by lightning (named "wonder boy") to help his New York Nights regain the pennant and thereby nullify the Judge's attempt to buy out all of Pop Fischers stock and take over the team.

In the final game of his career, with blood curdling from his loins, and the likelihood of his stomach exploding, Frank would face the image of his former self in a battle of the best ...but that is another story.

Back during the days when Michael was still called "Air", Frank became particularly aware of his abilities to impersonate. First was a garbage can, and then a pole, and even a small garden weasel. However, after transitioning through sixteen straight hours of anthropomorphic activity, Frank stumbled upon his best and foremost impression. His ability to re-create the daily activity of paramecium was simply uncanny; especially when he would split in two.

Of course, biologically, one can only evolve to a certain point before the world must be allowed to view such activity. Thus, we give you the current organism in his existing status; bold, strong, funny, and hermetically sealed for your enjoyment... The man formerly known as "obesive-one-kenobe"...Mr. Frank Caliendo. May the farce be with you.

WIN-LFAXSLI83ZN

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1. How Information is Protected: It is extremely important to us to protect the information you provide. Your information is protected by security measures in order to ensure that your information is not accessed by or disclosed to unauthorized parties. All credit card information is encrypted when your computer sends such information. Security software as well as the use of firewalls is used to protect all information. No security system can completely protect against all possible disclosure, but we take all measures required in order to protect your information.

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When you purchase tickets on the site, or enroll in any special programs that we may offer, financial information will be collected from you (which will include your name, billing address, credit card number and credit card expiration date).

From time to time we permit third party companies to display advertisements on our site. Those companies may use cookies and/or other tracking technology in order to collect information about those individuals who view their advertisements. We will not provide any personal information about you to these third parties.

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Non-personal information of our users may be aggregated and shared with third parties for general business purposes. No personal information will be provided when this non-personal information is disclosed.

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6. Choices Regarding Your Personal Information: If you have provided personal information, you may request that your personal information be removed from our database at any time by contacting us by filling the "Contact Us" form. However, we may still retain certain information associated with your account for recordkeeping integrity, as well as to prevent fraud, collect any fees owed, enforce our terms and conditions, take actions we think are necessary to protect the integrity of our website or to protect our users, or take other actions otherwise permitted by law. Please note that if we have already provided information about you to third parties (for example, if we’ve already sent your information to an event provider), or if you’ve given information to a third party (for example, by clicking on a website link taking you to a third party’s website, and you provided your contact information to that third party), retention of that information will be subject to those third parties’ policies. If you receive an unwanted email from a third party, you’ll have to opt-out from receiving further emails from that party itself.

7. Children’s Privacy: Our website is a general audience site and we do not knowingly collect personal information from children under the age of 13.

8. California Privacy Rights: If you are a California resident, you have the right to request information about how we share certain categories of personal information with third parties. California law gives you the right to send us a request at a designated address to receive the following information: 1. the categories of information we disclosed to third parties for their direct marketing purposes during the preceding calendar year;
2. the names and addresses of the third parties that received that information; and
3. if the nature of the third party’s business cannot be determined from their name, examples of the products or services marketed.

We may provide this information in a standard format that is not specific to you. The designated request is done by filling the "Contact Us" form.

9. Changes to Privacy Policy: This Privacy Policy is occasionally updated to reflect changes in our service and any changes in our privacy and security practices. When changes to this Privacy Policy are made, we will revise the date of the Privacy Policy. If any material change in the way we collect, use, and/or share your personal information is made, we will notify you by sending an e-mail to the e-mail address you most recently provided us, and/or by prominently posting notice of the changes on our website. We recommend that you check our website from time to time to remain updated as to any changes in our privacy or other policies.

10. Contacting Us: If you have any questions about this Privacy Policy, or if you would like to request information about our disclosure of personal information to third parties, please contact us by filling the "Contact Us" form.

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